Tuesday, January 5, 2010

New Year, New Beginning

I am feeling refreshed at the start of this new year (and new decade) and ready to get the show on the road!
Adjusting to life with 3 kiddos definitely had me feeling scattered and exhausted this past year, even when Preston finally started sleeping through the night. I thought our master plan of having Preston born right before Ella started kindergarten was ingenious, but it turned out to be more stressful than if she had just been home I think. Two big changes in scheduling and logistics left me feeling like I could never do all the things that I wanted to do and felt I should be doing. I kept stressing about whether or not Preston was really our last baby too...because I just need something to stress about I guess :-). I like to have a plan and since "the plan" had always been to have 3 or 4 children, when we hit 3 I felt like I needed to decide immediately whether or not there would be a fourth (despite Mike's assurances that we didn't). I think I felt like a failure for not transitioning into 3 better. I have easy pregnancies, easy babies, and for the most part easy kids (although depending on the day they each provide challenges), so why was it so tough? How can so many other women do it but I couldn't?! I finally figured it out (it had after all been half a year since Preston was born)...it's because I'm not a go with the flow type person. There are things I want to do and be as a mother and I wasn't doing them well enough with 3, which led me to think that I definitely can't do and be them for more than 3 kids. Maybe another year will go by and I'll be begging Mike to consider having one more :-), but for now, I am finally feeling content. I am feeling a little selfish too. I want some me time! Some me time that doesn't come with guilt that I should be doing something more with my babies instead of whatever I may be occupied with. I'm ready to go to the gym each day and attend book club meetings and be able to help out a friend when needed. By doing those things, I am better able to enjoy my time at home. Life seemed so simple and manageable a year ago and I am finally feeling that way again. Hallelujah!
So, for my new year, I want to get back to how things were.
When I was rested and exercising and not in survival mode. And 5 days into the year, I'm feeling really good about where we are headed! The girls helped me make dinner last night for the first time in a long time, we've been reading more books and playing more games again, and the house is put together enough that it isn't driving me crazy. We are going to make it through 2010 :-)!

So, here's our 2009 Year in Review (copied from Heather).
It was a busy year, but SO full of good times and fun memories. Not to mention of course the addition of sweet little Preston Michael.
(I tried to limit myself to 3 pictures per month, but some months it was HARD to narrow it down! Ok, let's be honest, it was hard every month!)
JANUARY
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FEBRUARY
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MARCH
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APRIL
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MAY
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JUNE
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JULY
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AUGUST
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SEPTEMBER
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OCTOBER
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NOVEMBER
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(these two photos by/with help from Janna)
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DECEMBER
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and our last family photo op of 2009...
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THE END
of 2009

14 comments:

Allie said...

I love your blog and all that you say. Your honesty about dealing with the norms of life make me feel normal. Thanks for updating your blog regularly, I love it.

Leighanna, Reid and William said...

I feel you, Marci. I am a high-stress kind of person and need to know what I am doing about 20 steps ahead of where I am. In fact, I am only 16 weeks along and stressing about if this will be our last kid - um, pretty stupid considering. But, I understand how you feel and for what it's worth - I think you are awesome. I can barely manage my 1 child... and I see your daily life with three and I'm impressed. :o)

Katie B said...

I think it's so funny that you say you feel like you haven't transitioned well into caring for three kids while other women do it easily, because I look at all you do with your kids and all the work you put into your family and am so impressed! So while I look from the outside in on your family, I'd say that you're one of the women who transitioned easily. I think you're doing a fabulous job and taking six months to readjust to a whole new child is pretty darn quick! You're an impressive lady and don't you forget it!

Thanks for the tips you gave me. I went out a bought ice cream after reading all the comments :) I'm trying to pay attention after I eat to see if I can detect any baby-like movement, but I still need some practice!

Diane said...

I remember all of these photos and can't believe some of them were a YEAR ago!

I enjoyed your self reflection. I relate to a lot of what you say. I am a frustrated perfectionist who always thinks about "the next thing on the list" before I have even completed the current thing. Thus, I always seem to have to remind myself to stop and enjoy THIS moment. I have had to relax a lot of my natural tendencies because of being a wife and mother to all these personalities just forced me, against my will, to learn to "go with the flow". It has been good for me and I don't stress over things like I used to. So it all works out.

Diane said...

ps. I want that ruffled top and purple sweater :)

Heather said...

Marci - The list turned out great - can you believe all the fun that happens each month as you look back on it like that?

alisa said...

I get a little of the credit for your 100,000+ visits! It's fun to check in on your beautiful family now and then and see how your children are growing. What a year it's been! I appreciated your reflections. Thank you for sharing them.

May you have a fabulous 2008!

p.s. I'm not a creepy stalker! I'm friends with Alisa M. and Diana H. and I know Mike from college.

Amy said...

I love all the pictures you posted! It was fun seeing them again! We need to get together soon. I haven't forgotten about my Pampered Chef stuff. When's a good day to get together? Happy New Year!

Cheryl Joy said...

I love you for saying you felt like a failure after your rough transition from two to three kids. I feel like this so often. I have this idea of how I should be.. if it doesn't work out just as planned, then I feel like a disappointment.

We need to chill! :)

I wish I was there... I would love to watch your kids while you went to book club. :)

kelley said...

Oh, my beautiful, wonderful and best mother ever eldest grandchild.
You are a great Mom, wife, daughter and granddaughter. Life is just full of adjustments, frustration, joy and love. You are getting it...enjoy every moment that you can. I love reading your blog with your honest thoughts on life. And of course, the wonderful pictures. Happy 2010!!!

Mommy Elizabeth said...

Ok, so I feel like you are my friend and we should have playdates together :) I have enjoyed reading your blog for several months and I have to admit this one is my FAVORITE entry! I felt like I could have written this word for word. I am pregnant with #3 and am a type A, organized, yadda yadda person which since having children I have lost some of that part of "me"... It is hard to go with the flow, for schedules to change, to allow others to help (esp. my husband :0 ) I just wanted to write because today you have inspired me and reminded me how tough a new baby is, but how worth it it is and how in a few short months life gets a tad easier and children and mommy's learn to go with the flow. THANK YOU! Now remind me of this in about 5 months!

KelleyAnne said...

This is my favorite post ever. Thanks Heather for the cute idea. How fun to look back at each month. I love all the pictures you chose.

(clearing throat)I don't know what you're talking about though. You certainly don't get any of those traits from me....☻

Laurie said...

What a fun year and great photos! My favorite is the one with the umbrellas. It's kind of sad at the end when you say "the end of 2009". Oh well, another year in front of us I guess!

Sarah S said...

It's so easy to be hard on ourselves! And I smiled when you said you expected the transition to three to be easier because other people make it look easy. I have thought that MANY times - how is it that I know people with four children and they seem just fine, and I can't handle having two?

But I also think kids get a little easier as they get older, so the phase we're in with baby/toddler (plus your kindergartener) is a busy, draining time. But fun too :) Sometimes I wish Eli would be more helpful - usually if I ask him to help me get something he'll give me a blank stare. Ahhh well.

I think you're a great mom! And I'm impressed you blog every day. That is a feat in itself - along with making a great dinner for your family and keeping that organized too.